my hamsters!

"Asilos Magdalena"

Enfermo llegué
y para componerme ando de vago
No me des tu obediencia
por que te enseño mi cuerpo de lodo
en donde la piel estuvo debil
con una hambre que no me deja cantar

En mi vida,
el oscuro me mantiene
cuando yo te vi
en la lluvia me prometistes tu sangre

Yo no me quedo en mi vida
el oscuro me mantiene
cuando yo te vi
en la lluvia me prometistes tu sangre
yo no me quedo

Y ya que caiste de este mundo
cargo una navaja
dios mio
para ti
Cuantas veces me mordiste
y cuantas veces yo me fui

Y ya no me estoy enamorado
con tus mentiras
el infierno me duermo
por que el infierno es la unica verdad

En mi vida,
el oscuro me mantiene
cuando yo te vi
en la lluvia me prometistes tu sangre

Yo no me quedo en mi vida
el oscuro me mantine
cuando yo te vi
en la lluvia me prometistes tu sangre
yo no me quedo

Estrella de la mañana
Samael te persigo a ti
y si me quedo sin alas
ademas me muero por ti

Dear,

    I like mac n cheese.

Dear,
I am a destitute scholar. I attend Ohio University in Athens Ohio. It is a fucking wasteland. College is overrated. Don't let anyone lie to you. It's expensive, time consuming, and physically/emotionally draining. I take the maximum of 20 credit hours [five classes] so I can get the hell out of here. I'm a double major. One in Creative Writing the other in Women's Studies. I'm supposed to graduate next spring. We'll see. And no, I don't know what you do with a Creative Writing major except work retail.
I live in an apartment with three other people. They are sometimes dirty. I am also obsessive compulsive and anally clean. Maybe that's half the problem. The other half is one roommate's constant refusal to clean up any mess it makes. I would drown it in the bathtub like an unwanted baby if I could. That has too many moral implications though, and being passive [aggressive], I could never commit such an act. However, if I could mind fuck it into it killing itself-well the more power to me.
On the weekends I live in Columbus Ohio and work 20 hours-ish at a Plato's Closet. I am a keyholder. That is the limbo state between associate and assistant manager. I can't work fulltime [obviously] so I am a keyholder. Living in limbo appears to be the subtitle to my life's book title. I love my job but I fear that if I stay there after I graduate from college I'll never leave unless it's in a black bag. Retail sucks in the overeducated.
The majority of my friends and family are in Columbus 2/3rds of the reason I go home every Friday after class. My parents live there. My fiancé lives there. My child [dog] Isabella Ora [Isa] the greatest chi-ha-ha [Chihuahua] lives with my parents along with a pack [4 other dogs] of wild beasts. I don't see my friends anymore, but they are in and around the Columbus area.
My fiancé and I have been together almost four years [in april] and we plan on getting married in September of 2008 after we both graduate from our respective colleges. He's an autotechnician for a local [large] dealership. He lives in the same suburb I do, with his parents and younger sister. He's four days younger but was a year behind me in school. We met in high school after I punched him in the face. He decided he was going to marry me 3 months after we met-I laughed at him, we were 16-but somehow we managed to not have a high school relationship. I am extremely pessimistic about love, marriage, and high school boyfriends. Ironic I guess. It helped that two months after we started to date we didn't go to the same high school anymore. I, unfortunately, had not planned on us staying together and applied to a college an hour and some away from home. I get to see him maybe ten hours a week, but we're okay. We have the rest of our lives to be constantly tripping over each other.
A few other mentionables:
I don't recycle.
I eat chicken [in and out of the sea] but no red meat. Pork is fucking red meat, suck it.
Reality TV makes me angry.

I'm afraid of phones.
Zombies.
Muppets.
Melting.
Surviving.
The things in the dark.
Dolls.
The sound of large fireworks.

I avoid mirrors.

I collect Jesus icons.

Sometimes. I truly believe megalomania is a state of being. One that I find myself in frequently.